are there any other kind really?

Friday, November 05, 2004

the next chapter

It's not just "like" I'm starting a new chapter in my life. I AM starting a new chapter in my life. If you were writing a book about me you'd be looking for a cliffhanger, some unanswered question to pull the reader into the next portion. And very soon you'd be ending the paragraph with a big chunk of blank space before the bottom of the page. And you'd be typing "Chapter 5" on the next page. Or maybe I'm not up to 5.... or maybe I'm well past 5, I don't know.

As of Monday I'm not "Christopher the trainer". I won't be ushering in a new group of 20-30 trainees every 6 weeks. Won't be spending 8 hours a day with them, training them to do the job they were hired for, and trying my damndest, in my own subversive way, to teach them a little bit about bigger things as well. And maybe, against policy, even if it was unwritten policy, make the whole 6 week ordeal fun as well.

Thursday, November 04, 2004

wake up

Goldfinger - Open your eyes

Today is the last night of my class. My last night as a trainer over all. My emotions are so mixed. I know that to be too content is to be too comfortable, is be be stagnant is to be dead. I do believe that when we quite trying new things, quite putting ourselves in uncomfortable situations, we quiet growing as well.
I think that I'll probably write enough about my change in jobs over the next few days or weeks.

Instead, as I'm listening to this song, I'm thinking how timely it is. It's not a recent song, I don't, think so at least. Hold on a second... "go google go!" It came out in 2002. 2 years into the Bush/Cheney reign, so maybe it's not such a coincidence that it fits so well today.

Open your eyes To the millions of lies That they tell you everyday
Open your mind To the clever disguise That the advertisements say
How do they know What's good for you?
Wake up, wake up, whoa Wake up, wake up, whoa
A shot to the head They're better off dead
Will you wake up, wake up, whoa
Destroy all the land And kill what you can Just to make the profits rise
Sell you from birth For all that you're worth
The money spreads like lies
And how do they know What's good for you?
Wake up, wake up, whoa Wake up, wake up, whoa
A shot to the head They're better off dead
Will you wake up, wake up, whoa
Don't wanna hate youDon't wanna blame it all on you
I'm out of options
If you don't look I'll force you to
If you don't look I'll force you to
If you don't look.. I'll force you to
Wake up, wake up, whoa Wake up, wake up, whoa A shot to the head
Just so you can be fed
Will you wake up, wake up, whoa
Open your eyes...
Open your eyes

-Later-
I broke my fast. What was that 3 Thursdays? 4? I didn't make it too long. It wasn't even that I needed to eat. I wasn't that hungry, and I broke my ritual for one slice of crappy pizza. Maybe that's why I quite though. I lost sight of the point. Today for instance, it was 2:00 before I remembered it was my day to fast. And I hadn't eaten anything anyway. And I think I learned my lesson, I probably knew it before anyway. We are such a food centered society. On the Thursdays that I swore off food, and I was a little more hungry than usual, I noticed it more. There's food everywhere. Restaurants every couple of blocks, half of TV is about food, and it's really all people talk about. Going one day a week without eating really wasn't so hard. Maybe I should try another experiment sometime and try to go one full day without talking about food. Now that would be hard.

why???

Why don't you love the kittens?

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

kittens



what? you don't love kittens?